May 25, 2023 | By David M. Wagner

“Why would I want to be a manager? Managers are terrible.”

Someone dear to me had been offered a leadership position – again. And their reasons for hesitance made sense. Previous managers had preferred dreaming up (usually ill-advised) ideas over doing hard work.

Moreover, they felt – despite my assurances that they would obviously be a better manager than their predecessors! – that they would be pressured to lead “a certain kind of way.”

Pressure to conform to “a certain kind of” leadership can come from others or from our own perceptions of norms and peer behaviors.

But resisting that pressure is key to showing up authentically and being the best leaders we can be.

Norms ≠ Right

Like my friend above, a client felt pressure to conform to a certain style of leadership.

The culture in their healthcare organization reflected the “professional distance” that many doctors are taught to maintain with their patients. My client knew their preference for being open about their opinions and emotions would buck office norms.

We discussed the downsides of the impersonal leadership style that dominated the office. Partnerships across groups were poor. Critical issues festered, unaddressed.

My client’s preference for openness and honesty was not just an authentic reflection of their personality. It was also the antidote that their organization most needed.

Your inclination to lead “differently” might be exactly what your team needs.

Lead How Only You Can

A different client was launching a program to support youth of color aspiring to be the first in their families to attend college. But in the face of widespread blowback against discussions that put race front-and-center, they felt pressure to drop the emphasis on “of color.”

I reminded my client of the reason they created this program: their transition to college was fraught with social barriers stemming from their race. They were in the unique position to help others navigate, and overcome, those same obstacles.

As Karissa Thacker wrote in The Art of Authenticity, leading authentically leads to “opportunities to make signature contributions that only you could make.”

Lead from your Strengths

I coached a client who literally wanted to “find their voice.” They felt like they were missing opportunities to be seen as a leader because their more boisterous peers dominated meetings.

Importantly, they preferred to engage with people one-on-one. We discussed ways they could use their strength, building individual relationships, to make themselves available to their team and be recognized as a leader. They even identified a potential mentor who led with a similar style.

When we act in a way that is consistent with our authentic leadership style, our strengths shine, and we offer our best selves to our teams.

You may feel pressure to conform to a certain mold of leadership. But leading authentically unleashes your strengths, your unique contributions, and perhaps the change of pace your team needs to thrive. Ready to embrace your style? Schedule a free consultation to get started.